Saturday, March 12, 2016

What makes you Happy??

So, this is going to be a little different than my usual posts full of pictures.

The last month has been pretty trying for me. We know we are moving this summer, however we still don't know where. We know Alvie is leaving for a month around the same time. I am still not working so I am home with the boys all day.

I'm not throwing a pity party. I have it good. I know I do. I have a beautiful wonderful life.

But have you ever been surrounded by people, but feel.. lonely??

That's how I've been feeling. Melancholy. I don't really have anything to focus on, since I don't know where we are moving to, we don't have any vacations I can dream about. My Dad is just getting sicker and sicker by the day, Every week I wonder if this is going to be the week I get 'that' phone call.

I'm just stuck.

So, I have been trying to really think up what makes me happy.  You think about it too, what REALLY makes you happy.

I was thinking. I don't really love watching movies or TV. I really don't love to read (I kinda find it tedious unless it is about nursing). I went on two girls nights in the past 2 weeks. (Something I hadn't done the entire time on the island.) It was an okay time, but I don't really like going out and drinking very much...... I used to LOVE running. Besides the pain afterwards I would be elated during a run. Now with my hip I can't run. So I had to cross that one off. I got the mirena IUD a month ago, so I don't know if it's the hormones, the being at home all day or the not getting to work but mannnnnn it was hard to think of stuff.

I like:
chocolate chip cookies
fresh pressed lemonade
sitting in the sand on the beach
cuddles with my babies
sticking people with needles (lucky for me when I'm working this gets satisfied more often! ha)
helping people, listening to their problems and talking with them
dancing to music
mochi ice cream
mashed potatoes and gravy

But do the things you like make you happy???

After lots of thinking I realized I truly love seeing new things, and taking my kids on 'adventures.' I love watching their little faces light up when they see the beach, or a new park/playground. I love watching them be so happy.  But that isn't really ME being happy is it, I think it is but when they grow up I guess that's where people have problems..?? I love going places I don't know, just adventuring around. It really makes me look back at my life and see how different the world is, how unique we all are and how grateful I am to be healthy.  So I've taken up doing yoga. I really think it's my next happy place.

Sitting on the cold mat focusing on my inner self. It helps me to be more gratified in my everyday life. Its a good feeling definitely. But I want to share it with someone. I want someone to talk about it. I think maybe that's my final discovery is that I love to talk with people.

Not always strangers, except in nursing. I love talking to people in nursing. I feel like it's my calling. I can sit and listen to their issues and for some reason people confide in me. I've had many people tell me they had considered suicide and they felt comfortable enough to tell me. I got them help! It made me feel sooo good when I could help people.

So I guess ultimately this post is just about finding yourself. For me, I need people. I need to feel needed maybe??

I can't wait to find out where we are going so that I can find another job. I love my kids, I love staying home with them and spending so much time with them. But I need my happy place, and luckily I found that happy place in a profession I can do forever.

If you're my friend. I miss you. I love talking to you and whenever you have anything you wanna talk about. I'm here, ready and eager to listen.

I would love to hear about some of the things that truly make you happy.

Thanks for listening.



  1. i liked this post! I think you are a person who is fulfilled through DOING. definitely an extrovert. I'm the same, but I also like sitting around doing nothing haha. As far as what makes me truly happy--hanging out with my family when everyone is happy is probably number one. Adventuring/Exploring or hanging out with good friends is #2. I'm a people person too. I need those people.

    1. I think that is VERY correct. I love just doing... anything! Glad we need peeps together ;)

  2. I have really enjoyed this whole stay at home mom thing and I've thought about this a lot too--like along the lines of "am I always going to like it? And then what happens when they are gone? What do I have left that brings me happiness? I feel envious you love your career so much because I feel lost in that department since what I thought I wanted to do isn't actually what I want anymore haha. But seeing new places brings me happiness. Cultural experiences like museums and concerts and theater makes me happy. And food. Ha. I love this post--it has gotten me thinking.

    1. I'm glad it got you thinking.. I really was feeling pretty down so I had to really truly think because I think when we become Moms we lose a little part of ourselves. Of coarse we gain amazing things we never thought we would love/enjoy. But, I've been trying to focus on me, and what I need as a person. I'm sure you will find what you love again, if you ever decide to go back into a career aspect. I could see you being in charge of a museum, or something with theater. You're my travel inspo, so I could see you and Victor doing something with that too!! Love you friend!