Tuesday, June 12, 2018

Does everyone Love their job???

Push yourself to do more and to experience more. Harness your energy to start expanding your dreams. Yes, expand your dreams. Don't accept a life of mediocrity when you hold such infinite potential within the fortress of your mind. Dare to tap into your greatness.  - Robin S. Sharma

Alright.

This post has been a long time coming. It's not really that amazing but it's basically how I have been feeling the last 6 months.

Everyone always tells you to never stop learning and never stop dreaming. So, that's what led me to ICU, the means to an end to make it to CRNA school. As a PACU nurse I was challenged occasionally. Not always daily, and really it was not always that hard. There is a quote I hear often saying, " PACU is where nurses go to die." Honestly, it's where many go before they retire. You don't deal with the complete uncertainty that the ER brings, you don't keep your critical intense patients for 12 hours like the ICU, and if your patient has to poop you basically just tell them to hold it until they get to the floor or until they get home to their "own" bathroom. (yes, sometimes it doesn't work, but ohhhhhhh many times it does!)  PACU is legit, it is not floor nursing. It is ever changing and always different, it has just enough critical care element to keep you guessing and you have enough autonomy to make quick decisions and really are tested on the strength of your nursing knowledge.  EVERYONE told me don't go, don't leave, you will hate it. But, on and on I went about how I am trying to be SMARTER!

Eff that man.

Smarter and harder go hand in hand. Also, pretty sure the grammar in that sentence is wrong. ICU has been everything everyone told me it would be. If I am being blatantly honest. I really do NOT love it. Maybe I will get there, but really I think I was just a spoiled little RN in my PACU trained life. Most RN's go from ER or ICU to PACU, so they've already gone through the trenches, while I just showed up there fresh faced and doe eyed with complete ignorance of the floor nursing struggle.

Most days I literally think to myself, " What the eff was I thinking?" 

Now, this post is not going to turn into some fluffy, oh but I am loving every moment now. Nope, wiping butts and dealing with patients trying to die every 4 hours has not been my cup of tea.. Lets be real, it's the poop. I just. can't. Oh, and the night shift. (insert eye roll emoji)

I am just trying to see if there is anyone else out there who is in the trenches right now thinking WTF did I do to myself, I had it so cush with my Monday -Friday day shift PACU job. 

We shall see what happens. Sometimes now I really think, man maybe now CRNA is too much.... What is happening to me?? I legit just wanna work my 3 12's, take my kids to the beach, eat acai bowls and hang with my friends listening to Taylor Swift...


Oh wait. I guess that is my life.


I guess the poop will pass....

Or not.


xoxo

Katelyn


If you wondered how I ended up in the ICU click HERE


Here are some of my PACU besties I miss every day! But, there are some legit awesome smart ass hell nurses in ICU, so that helps for sure. 



Best Nursing Judgement

Nursing for me has always been thought of as a stepping stone, path to lead me to the final stop on my career train. That's why last year I applied to the Nurse Practitioner program at USD and was accepted. I was really excited. But, then the entire summer I was torn between if this was the right decision for me, for us, for forever. 
I guess the back story here is that I always wanted to go to CRNA (Certified Registered Nurse Anesthetist) school. I wanted to do anesthesia. But, due to the military obligations with my husband getting into an ICU right out of school was just out of the question. I found myself literally trying to get ANY paying RN position. Out in Okinawa they basically live off Volunteers. I once had a LT ask me if I could just send my kids to daycare more often so that I could work more, for free. Blows my mind.  

Fast track 3 years later and no ICU experience, so I thought hey NP would be super cool too. But then the more I sat and thought about it I just felt like I was letting my former self down, not going after the dream I had originally set out for. So, I backed out of the program 2 weeks before it started. Honestly, it was like I could take a deep breath again. It ended up being the best decision for our family because Alvie decided to get out of the Marines and his job search situation would have been a nightmare with me in school. 

So, I decided I better get it in gear and get to the ICU if I just dropped out of my program. Luckily I worked some magic (more like begged my boss) and off I went on my transfer to ICU. 

And  here. I. am. 



Have I mentioned I love donuts????? 


xoxo